No matter how bad things get Nepalis don’t waste time worrying about it, we laugh heartily as our raft hurtles towards the rapids. That is because we know the situation is soon going to get much worse, so we may as well enjoy ourselves while things are still relatively better.
Which is why it was no surprise that The World Happiness Report 2021 released by the UN Sustainable Development Solutions Network last week ranked Nepal 87 out of 149 countries on the Gross National Happiness Index. Don’t laugh, we’re serious.
This is five points higher than the previous survey in 2018, and Nepal has now been declared the happiest country in South Asia, ahead of even Bhutan which is ruled by King Jigme the Glad. That bit of surprising good news should make us all even more happier still.
And since the UN has now officially certified us as a people who are becoming happier and happier every year, this calls for a three-day national holiday. While we are at it, as a matter of scientific inquiry, the Ass carefully explores the possible reasons why Nepalis continue to be so cheerful these days:
We have a prime minister who is a first-class clown, and keeps everyone entertained.
When Nepalis see that their glass is half-full, they don’t wallow in sorrow. They just toss it down neat.
Nepal has the highest per capita holidays in the calendar of any country in the world. We celebrate five new year days, and being a secular republic there are holy days for every major religion, and this Sunday is Holi Day. With government offices closed so often, there is less chance of being given the run-around at the Land Transport Office, which adds to our sense of contentment.
Let’s face it, we’d be really miserable if we stopped being miserable. Thank goodness we have an incompetent grovelment, intermittent electricity, and unbreathable air. So what if our roads have potholes, they’re paved with good intentions.
We never do today what can be done the day after tomorrow.
Nepal is a very transparent country. Nothing is secret here. In fact, it is no secret that secret talks are going on in secret at a secret venue even as we speak between the JSP and the Oligarchy to form the next grabberment. So, we are all secretly happy.
Nepalis always see a light at the end of the tunnel, even if it is a locomotive headed our way.
Happily, there are still Nepalis who are happy to just sit around and complain about how much happier we could be.
Nepal’s space program is taking off. Our young scientists just tested the country’s first rocket last week. It crashed. But we are still grinning our heads off.
The reason Nepalis are in unnaturally high spirits is probably because alcohol consumption per head is growing at a phenomenal rate. Just look at the ads.
GONe has gone and banned selfies on Mt Everest. This is because we are not content to be happy ourselves, we make the whole world laugh.But we won’t rest on our laurels, Nepalis will try to catch up and be as joyous as the Finns by setting up a National Happiness Commission.
Headline we’d like to see: ‘Nepal Happy with Oli’.
Read also: Last, but not least, Ass
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